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1634: The Ram Rebellion: Section Thirteen
Last updated: Wednesday, October 19, 2005 20:47 EDT
THE BRILLO LETTERS
by
Virginia DeMarce, Paula Goodlett, Kerryn Offord and Laura Runkle
Dear Flo,
I've been reading in the paper about your problems with your silly ram.
I still have the original 4-H patterns for making wrist pincushions stuffed with wool that has lanolin in it. These were used back in the 1930s and 1940s, when pins and needles were just steel rather than stainless steel. The lanolin keeps them from rusting.
The wool inside these doesn't have to be smooth or fine or long-fibered. It just has to be there.
If you want a copy of the instructions, just come by the Fabrics and Textile shop one of these days when you're in town. I'll put them on the shelf underneath the cash register and tell all the girls they are there.
Your Friend,
Mary Ellen Shaver
Dear Mary Ellen,
Thank you very much for your suggestion. I'll be making a trip to town in a day or so and will be very happy to have the use of your pattern.
I imagine you're talking about those silly broadsheets, instead of the Grantville Times or the Daily News. I must say that I do not approve of their content. Suggesting that a silly sheep could save the world for democracy, beat up a wolf, and so forth is clearly ludicrous. Brillo is a sheep, after all. I won't even address the issue of the drawings.
If you should happen to hear anything about who may be writing those outrageous stories, I'd appreciate being informed. I fully intend to take whatever measures necessary to stop this travesty.
Again, thank you for your suggestion. I'm looking forward to seeing the pattern and evaluating its usefulness.
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Flo,
I don't know whether your sheep can make the world safe for democracy.
But Veleda Riddle has decided that Grantville needs a chapter of the League of Women Voters. It was that pile of offal down by the slaughterhouse that the Garbage Guys didn't haul away Friday a week ago that made her decide we need one.
We didn't have one up-time, so she'll sort of be inventing the way she wants it to work instead of just copying the one that used to be. She's put that sheep (head only) on the stationery, along with the motto, "Might as well be hung for a sheep as for a lamb."
When Veleda gets going, smart people get out of her way.
Your friend,
Mary Ellen Shaver
Dear Mary Ellen,
I'll be writing Veleda to volunteer my services, such as they are. I'll be happy to help with the League of Women Voters. I have to agree, some things need to be fixed around here.
Do please let me know if there's anything else I can help with.
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Veleda,
Mary Ellen Shaver tells me that you're planning to start a chapter of the League of Women Voters here in Grantville. I just wanted to let you know that I'll be happy to help.
Please let me know if I can assist in any way. I certainly agree that some things need to be fixed around here. I do wonder, though, if the sheep’s head logo on your stationery is absolutely necessary. Wouldn't an eagle or hawk be more expressive of the organization’s goals?
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Flo,
Thanks so much for your offer to help. The next meeting is Thursday the 17th at 1:00 p.m. at the public library. The topic is horse manure.
I would really like to keep the sheep on the stationery. The Air Force already has taken hawks and eagles. It is only the head, and he has such a belligerent expression. When my grandmother used to go out to give the city council a piece of her mind, she always said as she went out the door, "Might as well be hung for a sheep as for a lamb."
Think about garbage collection. It will help keep your mind off your troubles.
Your friend,
Veleda Riddle
Dear Veleda,
I'll be happy to attend the meeting as scheduled.
Regarding the letterhead, well, it’s your project, so I'll agree with your plan. I can't say that I really care for this sheep motif that seems to have consumed the area. I just don't understand how sheep could have acquired such a reputation. They're fairly stupid animals, after all.
I'm a bit anxious to do something about the horse manure problem, myself. Maybe it should be collected and composted, rather than left lying on the streets. Perhaps we could require the type of collection bags horses wore in New Orleans, back up-time. J.D. and I were there on our second honeymoon, and it really seemed odd to see horses wearing those odd looking bags under their tails. Of course, those horses were pulling those romantic carriages. At any rate, something must be done.
Troubles? I don't have any troubles. Do appreciate the thought, but life's just fine here.
Let me know if you need anything.
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Flo,
We're all looking forward to seeing you at the meeting.
The city council was feeling so pleased with itself for closing the main streets to vehicular traffic during the day. But they have to open them for deliveries at night, of course, or all the stores would go out of business. So come start of business the next day, there it is—making outdoor Grantville smell all rustic. And, if anyone steps in it, making indoor Grantville smell all rustic for the rest of the day. Not to mention what the rural roads look like, and the streets in Deborah!
The Garbage Guys say there's no real market for it. Or, at least, that there's some market, but not enough in Grantville itself, so that it doesn't pay enough to cover the costs of collection and transportation out to the farms. Sort of like recycling used to be.
Your friend,
Veleda Riddle
Dear Flo,
I hear you're planning on doing something about the horse manure problem. May I suggest a money-making idea? I'm not yet sure where the best location would be for a composting operation, but I know that as a gardener, I would pay for manure composted with straw.
I know someone from one of those new chemical firms was also stopping by to see if he could get my chicken manure for a nitrate farm. Have they stopped by asking about sheep manure?
Anyway, the gardens need good compost. I might even buy some if it were delivered. The nitrate farms need good manure, too, and might even pick it up, free of charge.
Your friend,
Fran Genucci
P.S. Are the Methodist ladies planning on hosting the Catholic ladies this month, or is that second Saturday of next month?
Dear Flo,
I, along with my class, have been watching the stories about your sheep and I may have a suggestion for a use for the wool that doesn't meet the standards for clothing. Our Junior ROTC class has a problem in finding cleaning supplies for our target rifles. Wool-tipped swabs are perfect for putting a final coat of oil on the bore of a larger bore rifle. Obvious the quality of the wool is of little matter as long as the fibers are of a reasonable length.
A number of the younger children are sending you their drawings of Brillo in another package, but I did not want my letter to get lost in the shuffle.
P. Henry Johnson
Grantville Middle School
Dear Veleda,
I agree completely about the rustic smell. Enough is enough. Market or no market, expensive or not, Something Must Be Done.
Fran Genucci seems to think a composting operation is the answer. I simply don't have the time or the space for this operation.
Perhaps the kids involved with the 4-H club might like to get involved with this. They've certainly done a good job of salvaging plants.
I know it wouldn't be popular, but have you considered a "pooper scooper" law? I'm sure most of the ladies of the town would vote for it. If we got enough signatures, surely the city council would listen. I don't care how big a pooper scooper would have to be, the amount of manure on the streets and roads is getting completely out of hand.
I'll see you at the meeting.
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Fran,
According to Veleda, the Garbage Guys don't feel there is any profit to be made from a composting operation. Like you, I feel that there is some profit potential there.
Unfortunately, I just don't have the time or space to run this type of operation. I suggested to Veleda that we might try and interest the 4-H Club.
I believe that the second Saturday of next month is when the Methodist ladies host the luncheon for the Catholic ladies. I could be wrong about that, and will check with Mary Ellen Jones to be sure.
You are coming to the League of Women Voters meeting, aren't you? See you there.
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Mr. Johnson,
The drawings were adorable. Please let the children know that I really appreciate them.
I would be perfectly willing to provide the Junior ROTC class with some of the lower quality wool. Please let me know just how much you need. We don't have a huge amount of the lower quality wool, but I'm pleased to find another use for it. The pincushions are proving to be rather popular.
I do hope that the children will be able to make the swabs themselves. I'm afraid that things are pretty busy just at the moment so we won't be able to make the swabs.
I would appreciate a receipt for the wool. Taxes, you know.
Please let me know if there is anything else I can do.
Regards,
Flo Richards
Dear Flo,
Someone suggested horse diapers. I saw some of those bags on horses when Tom took me to Philadelphia to see the Liberty Bell.
Those are just a very few horses, though—for historical carriage rides. Here in Grantville, we've got thousands of horses it seems like, every day. It looks like we're going to keep on having them.
We can keep the idea in reserve, but I'm also afraid that just making the bags would take more cloth than we have right now. We pretty well need most of it to put clothes on people. The Ecumenical Emergency Refugee Relief Committee is bound to think that people are more important than prettifying the scenery.
Not to mention what the men are likely to say! I know what Tom said when I mentioned it to him at dinner!
Maybe at the meeting we can have one of those brainstorming sessions where everyone comes up with ideas and then we weed them out gradually.
Would one of those scraper things that the guys are using to scoop up creek gravel to surface the roads work as a giant pooper-scooper, do you suppose?
Your friend,
Veleda Riddle
Dear Veleda,
I do suppose the cloth shortage will end someday. I'd certainly like for it to be soon. My jeans are wearing out, and you know me, I just hate to have to pay those kinds of prices at the tailor’s. Perhaps the canvas people will be able to develop those bag things someday. Are they really called horse diapers? I giggle every time I think those words.
J.D. did do one of his snort noises when I mentioned them. Men! No imagination. Can't live with them and there's no resale value. Sigh.
I do wish someone were able to use Fran's composting idea. We're already composting here on the farm, but it's the rabbit waste. It's amazing how much waste such small critters can produce.
I really don't see why one of the scraper thingies wouldn't work. The trick will be getting one of them released for the work, I expect. Still, streets full of horse poop are not a good thing.
Well, I see I have yet another snooty noble type coming up the drive. Wonder if this one will do that “stare past me and demand” thing like the last one? I'm really getting tired of this dress-up and suck-up thing. And, I still don't understand this fascination with that rotten sheep.
See you at the meeting.
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Flo,
I asked Hannelore Heinzerling, and she agreed on three things—first on the luncheon date. She also agreed that it would be a good thing to be members of a League of Women Voters, and she asked about childcare plans for the meetings. I told her that I had no idea what the plans were, but that I'd be happy for Kathi to volunteer as a sitter. I told Kathi that it was her civic duty, and now she has gotten Anne Penzey to help her. Mina Matz wanted to help, but Kathi told her that since she's eighteen now, she should come to the meeting.
Did you know an idea would grow like this?
Finally, Hannelore thinks it's a shame that no one is making money off all of the horse manure. "It should be good for something beyond flies," is what she said. I really think that we could get one of those guys from the back hills interested in using it for a nitrogen farm for stuff that goes "boom." As for a place to put the manure, is the meeting at the library? Could Christy Penzey use all those land maps to help us figure out if there's even a place in the ring of Fire that would be safe to compost that much manure without endangering the water downstream?
Your frustrated friend,
Fran Genucci
P.S. Thank you so much for entertaining us with that ram of yours. Which of your partners writes those stories? Is it Herr Sprug? He seems so quiet.
Dear Fran,
It is amazing, isn't it? Once I finally convinced Anna Sprug, Ilsa Schmidt and Maggie Utt, that, YES, they really can vote and have a say in the world, they dug right in. So, they and Lena and I will all be at the meeting. We do plan to leave the children at home, under Ursula's supervision. There's just so many kids around this house, I don't feel it would be right to overload the baby-sitters that way.
Veleda and I have been discussing the manure problem. I certainly agree that it ought to be good for something. How about you talk to one of those guys you mentioned and see what he says? We're thinking that we might be able to at least get the stuff in question scraped off the roads with one of those scraper thingies. Surely if we get enough signatures and raise enough of a stink, the city council will listen. Have you spoken to Christy? It would be good if she could come to the meeting. That way, she could report to everyone at one time.
That reminds me, Veleda said there's a meeting, but I'm not sure where it is. Guess we better find out, hadn't we?
Fran, I have no idea who is writing those stories. It's making me crazy. It wasn't so bad when they just talked about the devil in sheep's clothing, but that last one!!!! I'm seriously ticked off about it. The very idea that I'm going buggy!!! I do not think the ram is smarter than I am. Honestly! I really don't think it could be Herr Sprug, unless he's hiding a much better understanding of English than I think he has. Although, there are translators, now that I think about it. Hmmm. I assure you, when I find out who's doing this, I will do something. Maybe I can put whoever it is in the pen with Brillo.
Of course, with my luck, the rotten ram will make nice.
Speaking of frustrated!!
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Veleda,
Thanks so much for the notification concerning the League of Women Voters meeting. Since it's during the day, I'll be sending the boys in my classes at the high school to the other section, and bringing all the girls from both American History sections. I'm getting Sarah Beth Cochran to bring her girls, too. We don't want to fall into the trap that happened up-time of getting this looked on as a project of busybodies who all fall into the category of, "The Old Gray Mare, She Ain't What She Used To Be!"
Even though most of us are, except for a few of the younger gals like Flo and Fran.
I do think that Sarah Beth and I can make a contribution to the manure discussion. Oliver and I keep five horses, you know, and have been riding to school with Sarah Beth since they hired us all to teach. Unless you work with animals, you don't realize just how big a manure pile just cleaning out the stables for five horses makes.
If we take the manure off the streets of Grantville, where are we going to put it? It will have to be somewhere that won't leach into the water supply, you know.
Should we ask Iona Nelson to bring the girls' choral group from the middle school? I know that we're keeping the Star Spangled Banner for the RoF anthem, but the contest for the NUS anthem is going strong. Iona has picked a tune written by a man who's still alive. His name is Johann Matthaeus Meyfarth and it's called, "Jerusalem, Du Hochgebaute Stadt." She says that it fits the tradition properly, because it's just as hard to sing as the "Banner."
The middle school students are working on writing lyrics in English and German. They can give us a sample before they take it to the competition at the Fairgrounds.
Yours,
Ardelle Edgerton
Dear Flo,
Well, I just talked to Veleda. She had the meeting scheduled for the public library, but she expected about twenty-five people.
She's moved it to the council room at city hall. Even that's going to be tight quarters. But the girls' choral group from the middle school will just come in, sing, and then go help with the baby-sitting.
The newest Brillo story is really cute.
Ciao,
Fran
Dear Veleda,
I announced the organizational meeting for the League of Women Voters when the Baptist ladies met on Wednesday. We have voted to provide refreshments.
It will be a memorable occasion for everyone.
Do you remember that flash flood in March before the RoF? That was the day before the Grantville Baptist ladies were to host the association for the District Women's Missionary Society. It hadn't been rescheduled yet. So we've been hoarding the supplies (it's not as if anybody was going to starve without them, really) until something came up that was worth using them for.
So we have five gallons of canned black cherries, and plenty of black cherry flavor Jell-o mix, and several cases of Coca Cola, and goodness knows we can get plenty of cottage cheese here down-time. Claudette will drop a note to Fred Swisher to put in a special order for us with the dairy that's supplying USE Steel and they'll send us three kegs the day before the LWV meeting, when the commuter bus returns.
So the Grantville Chapter of the League of Women Voters will be seen into existence by the very last black-cherry-and-Coca-Cola-and-cottage-cheese Jell-o salad in the world. If that doesn't make all our new immigrant voters sit up and start working for a world that can provide the ingredients again, we don't know what it will take.
We'll bring the serving dishes, too. We never did get rid of them when people started using paper plates. We just stored them.
Flo Richards picked up a copy of the old 4-H wrist pincushion pattern. I'll wait three days. If she hasn't decided to use it, then I'll just ask her for some of the wool she doesn't like. Karen can pay her something for it, and it's the kind of thing that Fabrics and Textiles can probably sell.
Yours,
Mary Ellen Shaver
Dear Fran,
Just got your note about the League of Women Voters meeting. Are we even sure the council room at city hall will be big enough? From the response I'm getting from the ladies I've seen lately, I don't think “voter apathy” is going to be a problem around here. I remember being so frustrated when people wouldn't vote in the up-time elections, don't you? The down-timers I've spoken to are thrilled to be able to contribute to the common good.
Yes, I agree that the ransom of Brillo story is cute. It's one of the reasons I don't think Johan Sprug can be the culprit. Where would he get time to read old short stories? The poor man works from sunup to sundown.
At any rate, I'll find whoever is doing this someday.
Have you heard of any possible nominations for officers of the League? Surely, Veleda will be president, as well she should be. But, who is going to be willing to be secretary and publish notes of the meetings?
Looking forward to seeing everyone,
Your friend, Flo Richards
Dear Flo,
Gosh, I hadn't gotten as far as thinking about nominations. I'll have to think about secretary, but what about Jeannie May Glazer for treasurer? She never says anything, but she's a real good bookkeeper.
Yours,
Fran
Dear Mary Ellen,
I really appreciate the old 4-H pincushion pattern. We've made a few and found that they sell very well.
To be honest, as much as I'm enjoying using my own new pincushion, we don't really have the capacity to produce very many. All these kids, the sheep, the rabbits, and so forth have all of us stretched to the limit already.
I wonder if your shop wouldn't be a better place to make and sell these pincushions. I can provide the untreated wool, if you'd like. What with unauthorized breeding going on around here, there's a fair bit of less-than-perfect wool to go around. The latest lamb crop had a certain number of crossbreeds that I didn't expect.
Do let me know.
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Flo,
What a generous offer. I took it to Karen and she'll be getting in touch about the business part—about whether you want to be paid for the wool up-front or want a percentage of the sales on the wrist pincushions. It won't be lots of money, because in addition to the wool, there's the cloth (luckily we can make these out of very small scraps) and the labor.
She's having most of these smaller pieces that we sell as "notions" made by the women in refugee housing. Lots of them used to do spinning part-time in their homes, but of course they lost their spinning wheels when they were burned out or whatever. She pays them the equivalent of minimum wage, which is apparently more than the people they did spinning for ever paid them.
Karen's looked into buying more spinning wheels and setting up a shop, but those things are expensive! The refugees say that after the bed and kettles, they were the most valuable thing the average woman owned.
See you at city hall!
Your friend,
Mary Ellen Shaver
Dear Veleda,
I really had to let you know that the response to a League of Women Voters is tremendous. I know you've moved the meeting location to city hall, but I'm not sure that will be big enough. The local women I've spoken to seem to be very taken with the idea.
I've heard that the Baptist ladies are going to provide refreshments. I'm so looking forward to something besides soup. Just a little bit of up-time treats will do so much for my morale.
J.D., in his usually grumbly way, mentioned that street cleaning could be done as a community service by a certain element of the population. Especially those who use community services by winding up in jail on Friday and Saturday nights. It does seem like it might be a deterrent for some of the less staid members of the population.
Of course, scooping it up is one thing. Where we're going to put it is another. Have you heard anything from Christie Penzey yet? We certainly don't want to contaminate the ground water. I've noticed that animals produce a surprising amount of waste product.
Looking forward to the meeting.
Your friend,
Flo Richards
Dear Veleda,
Wednesday, Mary Ellen Shaver announced to the Baptist Ladies that you're organizing a League of Women Voters. We think that this is wonderful. I don't know what you're thinking of tackling first, but somebody really ought to do something about the horse manure on the streets!
Of course we're all hoping for a wild success, but if a lot of people come, space could get to be a problem. I hope that you don't think that I'm butting in, but I talked to Archie and he is going to invite you to meet in the cafeteria here at the middle school. That will give you more space and the Baptist ladies can put the Jell-o salad in the refrigerators.
I also mentioned it to John, of course. The VOA is willing to make free announcements as a public service, if you would be so kind as to send him a paragraph.
Your friend,
Carole Ann Grover
Dear Veleda,
The Presbyterian ladies are very excited to hear about the League of Women Voters project.
We talked about it this week and Beryl Lawler is willing to write up a piece for the Grantville Times and then cover the meeting. Because of the society column, you know, she has a lot of contact with the down-time families—my goodness! Have you ever seen so many birth announcements and weddings in Grantville for as long as you can remember? And sometimes in that order, I'm sorry to say!
But, anyway. Beryl will be glad to do it. Please drop her a note when you finally know where it will be held.
Your friend,
Inez McDow
Dear Mary Ellen,
Well, Karen and I got the wool thing all worked out, so I'm including this note with the first batch. I think it's enough to get you started.
Have you noticed the huge response to the idea of the League of Women Voters? It's growing by leaps and bounds, and we haven't had the meeting yet! Speaking of the meeting, I've heard that it's going to be at the middle school cafeteria, instead of at city hall. Do hope we can get the location settled soon. I don't know about you, but I can hardly wait for a taste of that Jell-O salad.
Fran and I both think that Jeannie May Glazer should be nominated treasurer, and of course Veleda should be a shoo-in for the post of president, since it was her idea in the first place.
See you soon,
Flo
Dear Jewell,
I just wanted to thank you again for the wonderful idea of selling Master Mix as a fundraiser for the Home Ec programs. (I know, it's domestic science, and I'm sorry to offend you, but I just can't call it anything beyond Home Ec.)
Anyway, that Polish wheat really does make a difference. My biscuits are lighter than they've been since I ran out of Martha White Flour. Thank you so much. And it's going to such a good cause. I'm glad that you are reworking one of the model kitchens to have an icebox, a cast-iron stove, and a pump. Now that some of those new houses are equipped with these items, it really does help to have the students practice on them.
Lolly told me that this year for the joint eighth-grade science and home ec unit, you covered proteins. She was so proud of students learning to measure gluten content in flour by the water-method. I didn't tell her that I learned that method from my grandmother, who had to leave school before she got through sixth grade. She also told me that in the animal protein area, you showed the difference between animal proteins by making gelatin, and then by making meringue and marshmallows. I understand that the chicken and honey taste of the marshmallows was not nearly as bad as it sounds.
Would you be able to donate some marshmallows to the League of Women Voters Luncheon? It's hard to have Jell-o-and-cottage-cheese salad without marshmallows. I'm sure that Mary Ellen Shaver would appreciate some. I do hope the next meeting will be an evening meeting. 1:00 is right at the start of nap time for the children I'm watching.
Your Friend,
Miriam Aossey
My Dear Mrs. Riddle,
May I have the privilege of informing you that Mr. Agustino Nobili has told Mrs. Vivian Nobili and Mrs. Isabella Nobili that the League of Women Voters is a radical Socialist organization.
With my most sincere compliments and best wishes for your further prosperity,
Hannelore (Mrs. Gus) Heinzerling
My Dear Mrs. Heinzerling,
My husband has known Tino Nobili since he was a boy. Tino thought that the John Birch Society was dangerously liberal.
With best wishes,
Veleda (Mrs. Thomas) Riddle
Dear Linda,
Just out of curiosity, where did Hannelore Heinzerling learn to write English?
Veleda
Dear Veleda,
So you got one too? I think she's using an 1883 "epistolary manual" that she found in the rectory. She even uses the style when she leaves me notes about what hymns the priests want me to practice on Sunday.
The book has all sorts of forms. The writer just has to drop a couple of nouns and verbs into the blanks.
Linda
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